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Thursday, January 24, 2013

Grapevine Gawking, Part Uno

Sometimes I get this burst of cabin fever and want to run all over town.  But, I don't like to do it alone.  So, as any lunachick would do, I gather up the WHOLE family for a day out of the house.  All.freaking.five.of.freaking.us.  All mad as a hatter.
I get the kids ready while Ryan gets ready.  This is the system. Then, I get myself ready as Ryan stuffs everyone into the car, which resembles cramming a deflated air mattress back in its original box.  Only arms and legs are flailing and there are high pitched screams echoing throughout the garage.  This works because... after 13 trips to and from the car for things like Tay's pink deer zebra (which is neither - its a Pokemon creature) or a Sock Monkey sticker that Tay just NEEEEEDS or a rubber chicken dog toy that Maven has adopted or to put up a knife that CK snuck out the door with him... it takes about 33 minutes to get the kids packed and buckled (that time is no exaggeration).  And, we.always.forget.something.  Always.  Usually, its just a coupon or something irrelevant (yet, still, my mind will focus on that one forgotten thing for the rest of the day) but, othertimes, its a shoe or a bottle.  If its a shoe, its not worthy of a turn-around.  But, a bottle will calm a screaming baby.  Feeding a baby is one of those things that a parent is absolutely 100% required to do.  Double shoe-ing a kids isn't in the manual anywhere, so the rules are debatable.
Sssoooo... we went out to explore Grapevine and have a family day/annual anniversary dinner at the Gaylord.  First, right at nap time, we landed at the aquarium in Grapevine Mills.  I highly recommend this place.  I ran around in circles like a fat kid with a lollipop.  I looooove adventures and exploring.  I am so happy that this passion has been passed down to my kids. 














I took a picture of this sign for a very good reason.  Remember this?  <--- click on "this" and then scroll down to "crazy fish", around mid-post.
Okay, now read below:
ITS.THE.SAME.FREAKING.FISH.
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 That little fish didn't just swim into that box.  I put him there.  ME!  MY HANDS!

Its a good thing I am immortal.



Anway, we all had a REALLY good time at the aquarium.  We will definitely go back.


 

Friday, January 18, 2013

Boating vs Voting

Christian woke up early in the morning.
Like, all the time.  The end.

No, really... Christian woke up early.
Ryan told him to go back to bed or else he'd have to take a nap. 
Christian replied "I can't take a nap later!  We're going to get a new captain, remember?"
Ryan looked at him in still-sleep-mode confusion.
Christian said "Mom told us we have to go boating today and get a better captain."
Ryan... still confused.... hang on... wait for it...
"OOOHHHH!!!  Voting!  Yes, a new PRESIDENT!  Gotcha!"
Once we pulled up to the courthouse I explained to CK that we keep our vote choice private.  Emphasis there.
Apparently, that memo missed his inbox. 
AS SOON AS WE GOT TO THE POLL BOOTH, he was saying in a definitely-not-quiet-voice "Let's get rid of the bad guy!  Did you pick Romney?  Is everyone here picking Romney?  Do they know they other guy is bad?  They should know!" 
Huuuuuuush, dude.  People around here are going to assume we're rich Republicans... they'll sit behind my car, force me to hit them, and then sue us.  We'll end up eating Spam-ghetti at the shelter.  Then we'll have to vote for the bad guy next time.  That's how it always happens, I hear.
We arrived at the courthouse (after releasing our turtle), so it was already a bit of a solemn day.  (aaand that reveals how old this story is... or maybe the whole "voting thing" was a clue. but, whatevs.)  So, when we left after not "boating", the kids were irked... 
Polls instead of wakeboards?  Long lines of impatient sweaty people instead of the wide open lake?  Who the heck are these people and where are the cool parents I signed up for?
Yep.  Sorry to burst your bubble, sport. 
Its too cold and its voting-with-a-"V" season.

Here is Tay feeling jipped when she realized what was going on:

Whenever CK comes up with different sayings, they usually become our usual sayings.  So, from this point on, our family has referred to voting as boating.  We also become aggritated sometimes.  Then there is one of my faves "Who matters" (a smash up of who cares and why does it matter).  I also really like "ear picks" (Q-Tips).  Sometimes his words just make more sense.  Have Webster give CK a call the next time he is printing out a new dictionary. 

Kids are cute.  Especially when they're your own.  They make me laugh every.single.day.
 

Thursday, January 17, 2013

Pajama Life

I've made it my mission to go out in public less these days.  Public requires dressing in something other than pajamas and checking my face in the mirror, and with my current level of energy, that's just too much for me right now.  Plus, its friggin' cold.  Texas cold, but that still counts. 
We really could write a book on weird ways to keep from going all REDRUM crazy on each other. 
 
 
 
I may have already posted this video, but its something we still do... or something I have the kids do so I can laugh at them.  This one is older, seeing as Tay is still sleeping in a diaper.
 
Ryan plays hide-and-seek with the kids.  Both kids tell him where to hide.  Explain the sense in "seeking" here.  ????  No kidding, here are two ways Tay picked for Ryan to hide:

How long do you think it took her to find him?

Other times, we will watch Tay do nasty things.  Like here, where she is drinking smoked oyster juice.  For realzzz, it was gross.  She does lots of gross things.
 
Or, we play "See where we can stick the baby"...
Maven has been in lots of things.  We also play this game with the older two.  One time, Ryan wrapped CK up in a blanket and stuck him on top of the fridge.  (For all the safety police out there, we told him to be careful!)
 
While we're on the subject of safety... The kids also do fun things like this:
And this...
 
On special occasions, Ryan and I really enjoy us a good old fashioned game of crippled.  I lay down and relax every single muscle, becoming a lump of dead weight... I, then, weigh 346 pounds.  I tell him I need to do various things such as check the mail, go lay on my bed, or whatever.  Ryan especially likes how my arms and legs fall around like wet noodles as he is trying to lift me.  It takes about 20 minutes for him to get half of my body off of the ground.  Then, after my stomach is rock hard from laughing uncontrollably, Ryan gives up out of exhaustion.  Wash.Rinse.Repeat another time.
 
Or, we will play a game of  "Who can find the biggest bra" at Target.  Christian won that game last time.  I had a pic of him wearing one cup over his entire head, but it somehow disappeared.  So, that image is left to your imagination.
 
Or, I will play match the babies.  I think I scored big time on this:
 
Sometimes, we pretend like our kids are the parents. To make this believable, Maven has to be in full character:
 
And then, there is this fun game (and ignore my lack of knowledge for the English language.  I had already been laughing so hard that my brain had turned to mush.  Or, I had a sudden onset of stage/video phone fright.):
 
BUT!... There are times when we do venture out.  (In all actuality, we are very busy people.  Which is why I savor the flavor of home life.) 
This is why I love Texas.  Shorts are winter clothes sometimes.  Sometimes shorts and a jacket are winter clothes.  Sometimes, shorts in the morning and a parka at night are winter clothes. 
 
Bam ventures, too.  He is a creeper dog.  Always there, you just don't always know he is there.  Maybe he'd prefer I call him a ninja dog.  Except he has a weight problem, so that isn't so accurate.

When we go out, I take "the others" and make them look cute.  Its my incentive for picking boogers off of the wall and wiping tiny hineys all day every day.




Otherwise, its life at home playing weirdo games in pajamas for us.