Q: What do you get from sitting on the snow too long? A: Polaroids!

TEXAS
HAD
SNOW!!!

This is major headlines, people!!! 
Yep.

Actually, its kind of been a theme the past few years. See exhibit A and exhibit B.  As well as the treacherous aftermath. See exhibit C  The week before Tay was born, our trees were so weighted down with snow that the massive branches snapped like toothpicks.

I wonder if this year we beat the record of arrogant drivers that thought "I got this!".

 

Is gravy a beverage?

We had a scrum-didily-umpscious Thanksgiving dinner at the farm.  We brought our RV (aka our house). 

This was CK's first year to ride the big 4 wheeler by himself. He wrecked it and broke his arm. 

Just kidding. 

If you know anything about CK, then you know he did excellent. (We told him to stay in 1st gear) 

At one point all the women were in the barn talking about various important life issues. One adult said "I agree" and quickly, right on que, Tay said "Well, I don't". She is fluent in sass and know-it-all, and for the record, nothing like her momma. 

Ohmuhgosh. Did I really take a pic of a dead hog and no relatives??? :/  Hello, girl with the freakin' camera!! 

Kids, Chil'n, Offspring, Tikes, Minis

 CK pretending to be a hermit crab:

 

CK fixed his own hair: 

 

 CK made pockets:

 
I gave CK racing stripes:

 
CK dressed (and posed) himself:

 

 Again, CK dressed himself:

 

CK is SUPER into his iphone (and I busted him!):

 

 Tay got her face painted - pink and sparkly, of course:

 
She now reads:

 

 

And walks like a cintar:

Maven wants sooo badly to do cheer with Tay:

 
She loves to climb:

 
She had her first hospital visit (closed airways):

 
Rips off her diaper:

 
And loves being naked:

 
Of course, she knows her age:

And knows all of her body parts:

 

Tayles

Watch out for us on the next Walmartians email you get. 

Maven didn't have shoes, her diaper hung way past her skirt and literally skimmed her inner knees (In my defense, she IS between sizes. But, it doesn't help that it was severely wetted, er weighted down.). This fact was not-so-subtly pointed out by a young passerby. Tay took off her own shoes somewhere mid-shopping experience. All three of the kids were running around like bats by a strobe light. This is no exaggeration. They ganged up and boycotted cart-sitting. (There may have even been some picketing in their riot.) I should have just have admitted that this was too much bottled up energy for a Walmart afternoon. Stubbornly, I went ahead. As I was looking at something frozen, I had my back turned. All three kids danced around in the aisle making wild animals noises. A VERY elderly lady in a motorized cart came our way. Her not-young-enough assistant followed. I said "y'all watch out" and "move" in every way possible except French. Nothing happened. So, I grabbed Tay to physically move her. She fell. (Of COURSE she fell.) To keep things progressing, I grabbed Maven to move her while Tay found her balance. Maven fell, too. As I helped Maven get up, Tay jumped up like a cat that had spotted prey, ready to pounce. She DID pounce. And the prey was the elderly lady's basket on her motorized cart. Tay grabbed her little basket (the one that sits in front of the handle bars), fixed her feet on the motor, and arched waaaaaay back while releasing a very loud "woooeeeeeee" noise. Ck laughed first. Then I lost it. Doubled over in uncontrollable hysterics, I tried to muster up a "get off of there". But, it sounds more like an echoed "bbbbbwwwwaaaaa". The lady never cracked a smile or batted an eye. I tried to make it a swift grab and walk off, but Tay ran from me - in circles - still in front of the lady's cart - so, she was STILL "observing" us. Finally. FINALLY. Finally, her path was clear and she passed us, turning down the next aisle - where I am sure she could still hear CK and I laughing inappropriately loud and prolonged. 

Shortly after, Tay tried to crawl under my cart. As soon as her head went under the basket, he hair got stuck. She pulled and screamed and hollered as her hiney was stuck in the air. 

I thought about leaving her there until after checkout. But, she had already made a scene. 

On the way back from my Dad's house, Tay ate 2/3 of a bottle of baby powder with a spoon. It was nighttime and I thought she was sleeping - not OD'ing on talc!! I heard her choking. When I checked on her, she pretended to be asleep. I saw choking + limp kid + white lips and assumed she was dead. I pulled over in a completely panic. Which shortly shifted to confusion, disgust, and anger all at once. 

We went to Sak's Fifth Avenue. This is how it looked when we left: 

When we got there, that mannequin had two arms, both fully attached. To make up for it, she mopped the floor with her back. 

This is my life with her. This is her life forever. 

A few things that have come from the mind of Taylor Rose:

Does God have a phone? Can you call him? 

Awwww! 

(Looking at road kill)

Poor little guy. That skunk is dead with his blood all shot out of him. Let's get a bag and take him home. 

That horsey just said "bye" with his tail! 

Movin' downward

After spending many hours of many days couped up like this:

To show this:

 

We finally sold it! 

And are now living in this for a little bit:

 

 

Yep. 

To classy it up, we're staying at a resort.  It sounds better that way, don't you think?  We live in an RV... but at a resort. 

 

 I also sold my car and we are now driving this:

Just kidding.
That is a little glimpse of the resort.
 

And, to top off the trailer park life, I am rockin' a  new killer look.

 



You can't tell much in the pic, but I temporarily have  super awesome train tracks on my teeth!

 

 

 

Don't you feel better about your own life?