Howdy Doody, Partners

In true living-in-an-RV-at-a-dude-ranch style, the girls' birthday party was hillbillied out.  (Yes, that's a legitimate descriptive word.)
We invited some folks out for a horse ride, hot dogs, bounce house, and mechanical bull rides.  The horse was supposed to take the kids around on a trail, but we had a freak cold front blow through that very morning.  It ended up freeeeeeeeezing.  No one had a jacket, so we pulled out whatever we had in the RV and passed them out according to whoever/whomever (whatever!) we loved most. 
(kidding, JUST kidding)
Tay talked FOREVER about riding the horse.  Like, it was seriously annoying.  And then, the day of, she woke up in a funk too early from the excitement and BAM!, zero interest in the horse. 
So, I did as any good mom would do - I forced her to ride it. 
Just ride the FLIPPIN' horse, and smile DAMMIT!
...You know how it goes.  The whole "be happy or I will make you run for your life" bit.
Then, the cheap and desperate resort to bribery - candy.
Neither tactic worked.  She whined and fought.
She barely even wanted to ride the bull.  At first.  Eventually, the bull was bombarded by flying tiny people  (mostly Tay, Maven included) like shrapnel from a bomb.  Poor ol' thang. 

The two green flower pots with the pink tulips are actually dirt cake - complete with oreos, pudding, cream cheese, and whipped cream.  I think its supposed to be diet friendly.

 
We served the dirt with shovels. And by "served", I mean the kids licked them like suckers.

Is there a plot behind those eyes to eat all of Tay's candy?

Tay apparently sensed Blue's corruption.

 

I know this is so blurry, but he wouldn't let me take a picture.  He looked like a little Dopey, to me!

 

As if there wasn't enough sugar in the dirt cakes I made, Bonnie made herself some sweet with a splash of tea.

 

After the temperature had dropped, the horse had left, and Tay was doped up on sugar, she begged to ride Blue. 
Of course.

 

Another 29th birthday

How is it that these keep coming around at the same time every.single.year?!
Where's the return receipt for this tradition?

Ryan surprised me with a new baby.  Not a womb/uterus/get-fat kind of baby, but an awesome camera baby.  However, it may have still woken me up at night and consumed hours of play-time.  I have decided to pay-it-forward with my old camera, since that is how I received it.  (Thank you, as always, Mr. Kieke!!)

^I didn't even see this gift sitting on the table at first.  He casually set it down as he had just come home, which I somehow totally didn't even notice.  Ryan is typically about a subtle as a shotgun, so this, too, was VERY impressive.

 

He gave me another BCBG dress and MADE the wrapping paper and bow!!!  

 

I was so impressed over his craftiness, that I forgot to take a picture of the actual gift.

But, its this dress in brown leopard-ish:

 

 And we went out to eat.  We told them we were celebrating the girls' birthdays, so they delivered these bad mambajambas.

 

 Maven ate butter with her steak knife. Her sister has taught her well. 
(Hang on before you holler - we switched it out with another less-deadly utensil immediately after this photo was taken.  Chill, dill.)

Ryan stayed home while I went out with Shane and a few friends.  Anytime the Meric (Mer/Eric) combination is present, things get dumb.  Like ketchup shots, or who can eat the most of the hottest hot sauce, or 117 lb Mer giving 217 (?) lb Eric a piggy back ride.  He and I go way back and have been great weirdos ever since.

Check out Lindsey's leg! Hello!

Yep.  That hurt the next day, and the next.

Selfies, of course!  We took these to send to Ryan.

We held up the wall for a bit.  Somebody's gotta do it.

Don't we look like such nice, wholesome people?

Tearin' up the dance floor.  Though, by Eric's face, you'd think he was tearin' up his britches!

After a fun night and many pictures to prove it, all I can conclude is... My mouth is sure open a lot!

CK

Don't you hate when you jump the fence and your nostril consumes a stick? 

He doesn't even realize he is a fashionista or that he stands like he is modeling.

^I did not pose him.  Scouts honor.

 

Excelling in math...

 

 

 This is what happens when you let Daddy come up with handwriting sentences. (Yep, still working on that handwriting)

^I have a tiny little small ding dong.  I saw a snail that had a bigger wizard than me.

 

Karate swagger. 'Nuff said. 

This hole was not caused by another stick. It's a right-of-passage... One that was both fun (pulling it) and sad for me (why is it that once a kid loses a tooth, they automatically look like a 30 year old?! Does that not make as much sense to you as it does me?) 

And a few of CK's creation: 

Monster

Penguin

Penguins 

Christian was invited to a guys weekend.  "What happens during guys weekend, stay at guys weekend" is all I was told. 

 

Cool trick, bro.
CK came in from the bathroom with a piece of toilet paper sticking out of his pants.  He overly casually "noticed" it in the mirror.  "Oh, whaa what is that?  Mom will you get that for me?"  I told him no, he could pull his own toilet paper from his pants.  He said "nevermind.  It was a trick. Its going down my crack and tied to my pee pee."
I wonder what he figured the trick was?

Kids, don't play soccer barefoot.

And maneuvering has been conquered!

 

 

 

Impressed on Valentines Day

I returned home to the RV to find this laying on my bed: 

With this note beside it:

We ended up lassoing the kids, heading to Waco, and eating at a 2-hour-wait hibachi grill with my cousin and her family. We had work to do at the property the next day and this is the only way we could make it romantic enough to say we did something for Valentines Day. 

I was thoroughly impressed with his girl-clothes-picking-out skills. Especially because these are made by one of my favorite designers, BCBG, and I never told him that. He just overheard a conversation. (Maybe every time I need something done I should just tell a standerby in a loud voice.)